Seeing two people kiss in public can produce a surprisingly wide range of reactions. Some people find it sweet and barely notice. Others look away, feel uncomfortable or wonder why strangers couldn’t save their affection for somewhere more private.
And then there are moments when witnessing someone else’s romance brings up a feeling that seems much bigger than the situation itself.
A public display of affection, or PDA, can serve as an unexpected reminder of what someone may be missing, wanting or thinking about in their own life. Recent research suggests this reaction may be especially noticeable among younger adults.
One third of Gen Z respondents said they don’t like seeing couples make out in public, compared with fewer than one in five millennials. More than half of the Gen Z respondents who disliked public kissing said it could make them feel lonely.
That doesn’t necessarily mean everyone who feels uncomfortable watching PDA wants the relationship they see in front of them. Sometimes, the reaction may have more to do with the emotions that the moment brings to the surface.
Why PDA can feel so personal
Public affection has always been a divisive subject. Holding hands or sharing a quick kiss may seem perfectly ordinary to one person while making another person uncomfortable.
But there may be another layer to the reaction, particularly for people who have grown up in an environment where public moments are frequently photographed, filmed and shared online.
The possibility that almost anything can become content may make people more likely to wonder whether public affection is spontaneous or deliberately being displayed for an audience.
That doesn’t mean every couple showing affection is performing for attention. Instead, it highlights how social media may have changed the way people interpret behavior happening in public.
Seeing romance can highlight what’s missing
One reason PDA can feel unexpectedly emotional is that it makes intimacy visible.
Watching another person experience closeness, affection or excitement may remind someone of a connection they once had, currently want or simply wish were part of their life.
That feeling can sometimes resemble jealousy, but jealousy doesn’t necessarily mean wanting the exact relationship another person has.
The couple might simply represent something broader, such as companionship, affection or feeling wanted.
In that sense, the emotional response may provide useful information. Instead of focusing entirely on the strangers involved, someone might ask what the moment brought up for them.
Do they miss having someone to come home to? Do they want more affection in their current relationship? Are they feeling disconnected from friends or other people in their life?
The answers can be more revealing than the PDA itself.
Why a strong reaction can become anger
When an unexpected emotion appears, people don’t always pause to understand it.
Someone who feels lonely while watching a couple kiss might instead decide that the couple is being inappropriate. Someone who feels uncomfortable might become irritated or judgmental.
That emotional shift can make it easier to direct an uncomfortable feeling outward rather than examining where it originated.
Social media can amplify that process. A person who sees something they dislike can immediately record it, post it and invite thousands of strangers to react.
A recent viral incident involving two strangers kissing on a public bench illustrated how quickly a private moment between people in a public space can become online entertainment. The resulting attention went well beyond the original interaction.
The episode also raises broader questions about what people feel entitled to record and share simply because something happens in public.
What to do when PDA brings up a big emotion
You don’t have to enjoy seeing strangers kiss. Feeling awkward or annoyed is perfectly possible without it meaning something profound.
But if the emotional response seems unusually strong, taking a moment before reacting can be useful.
Instead of immediately judging the couple or reaching for a phone, consider what you’re actually feeling. Is it loneliness, envy, embarrassment, frustration or something else?
The goal isn’t to turn every encounter with PDA into a psychological investigation. It’s simply to recognize that an intense reaction can sometimes have more than one source.
A brief moment of self reflection can also prevent an uncomfortable feeling from becoming an unnecessary confrontation.
PDA can be a reminder to practice empathy
Ultimately, the strangers showing affection in front of you have their own lives, experiences and relationships. Their happiness doesn’t take anything away from yours.
And while public affection can certainly cross someone’s personal comfort level, not every display deserves public criticism or online scrutiny.
The next time you encounter an unexpected make out session on your commute, you don’t have to celebrate it. You don’t have to understand it, either.
But if it bothers you more than you expected, it may be worth looking inward before deciding that the couple is the problem. Sometimes, what we see in other people’s relationships simply reminds us of what we’re feeling in our own.
